A man who made a New Year’s resolution to be celibate for a year after breaking up with his boyfriend has revealed how a sex-free 2018 made him realise he is straight – and he now wants to lose his virginity to a woman.
After coming out aged 14 to his family, Dominic Hilton, 27, from Bournemouth grew up believing ‘110 per cent’ that he was gay.
Between the ages of 18 and 19, he even worked as a male escort, and said he had no doubt he would one day marry a man.
But, after splitting with his ex, who he doesn’t wish to name, on Christmas Day 2017, he made a radical resolution to spend 2018 celibate in order to discover a little more about himself.
Now, as he prepares to rejoin the dating world, he has resolved to lose his virginity to a woman – after coming to the realisation that he is straight when his sexual attraction to men disappeared during his year of celibacy.
Being celibate for a year was a major undertaking as Dominic, who’s had between 100 and 150 male sexual partners, had never had a long period of celibacy before.
Dominic, a model and mental health worker from Bournemouth, said: ‘Sex is always something I enjoyed, but this past year, that sexual attraction to men has just gone.
Dominic’s most recent relationship came to an end on Christmas Day 2017, when he split with his ex-boyfriend of two years over dinner.
In the wake of the break up, he made a vow to dedicate 2018 to himself, and step away from the dating scene for a while.
Then, after reading an online article about the benefits of celibacy, he decided to go one step further and give up sex altogether for 365 days.
He said: ‘To get over someone, a lot of people go and get under someone else, but I didn’t want to do that.
‘I started reading up on celibacy and saw people talk about how it had helped their self-esteem, lessened their anxieties, given them more energy and generally taught them more about who they were.
‘At that point, I was still feeling down about my break up, so I just wanted to do something to make me happy. I never imagined celibacy would change my life as much as it has.’
So far, though he has tried to be as honest as possible when chatting to women on dating apps, he has found that telling them he previously identified as gay can be tricky.
‘It can really shut down a conversation. Though nobody has said anything outrightly rude, they just stop talking, which I almost hate more as it leaves you feeling dismissed and ignored,’ he said.
‘I told one girl, and she ended up blocking me an hour before we were due to meet which was hurtful.
‘A lot of people don’t understand it, and think that I am gay but this is a phase. I have no doubt that I am straight though.’
As for taking a break from sex – he thinks more people should try it.
‘I would recommend celibacy to anyone feeling a little lost in life. Even if you don’t go a whole year, just take some time and focus on yourself – you may be surprised at what you learn.’